Thursday, September 23, 2004

yesterday was one of my worst day in my life... wat happen was a series of bad luck(that is what i think)... in the begining of the day i didn't really want to go to school.... but i drag myself up...
When i went to school i have to rush my physic work to pass up to teacher(thanks god i finish every work in 2 days time....) after that i went to the physic lab... the lesson was very boring.. it was actually from a cd rom from the government and trust me even if you are so wade awake you will also feel sleepy...
After recess time it was chemistry... the teacher told me that she is not happy with my work(well was she ever happy with my work i guess so when she allow me to sleep during the test) hehehehhe... when i got back my paper and look at it i think i did not bad... jus abit of mistake here and there.. but i think i can do better next time....
After school i went to the library to study with some friends... then there was a friend was suppose to follow me home...and let her be A... When it's already 2 i can't find her in the library... Then i though maybe she don want to join me anymore... so i study till it was 4 but i still can't find her... when is time to go home i went to the canteen but still no sign of her... so i was angry at her and went to her house to find her...
What happen was she came out from the house and i was really mad at her for not telling me that she went home earlier....i ask her how she came back and everything and i din except her explaination...she say she can't find me but i told her that i'm gona be in the library....
the next thing i know is that i've been lock out of my house when i reach home... my mom went out and my brother is sleeping upstair... well i think even if there is a atomic bomb that is being drop he won even wake up... so i was lock out of my house for an hour or so before my mom reach home....
What a day!!! haih.. i jus hope that it will be the worst day and it won repeat in history anymore... phewww.... i am jus so glad that i'm home... |

Friday, September 17, 2004

Haih exam is jus creaping up on me again from that conner... who would have tot that exam would be that near... Haih should have guess... What is studying life without exam..There is no escape...
Well exam is jus next next week and i have not started studying.. ok fine i did do a tinny bit of studying b4 that but that is jus too little to be counted... I got piles of stupid physic homework pilling up(haven't been trying to do ever since don remember when) and teacher is jus gona check next week... Ahhhh i'm so death...
Talking about physic.. i think i don know a thing.. well is not my fault that i don understand.. ok maybe it is but then wats the point of it when i not even interested in it... (the point that i got in to that class is cuz there is pratically no other choice for me)but anyway i think i can get tru it.. maybe not this exam maybe i'll start studying it next year.. well who knows.....
All i know is that i'm comfirm gona flunk this physic test.. not to talk about my pengajian am.. well teacher did give us a test 2day and guess wat... i fail.. well actually that paper was not that hard but i guess i was not listening to teacher in class... well... ok fine that one need abit of reading n i PROMISS that i'll read it tomorrow(yeah right)....
talking about maths... i don think i understand what crap did my math 1 teacher talking about with all the stupid thing that jus pop up....( hey i'm not the only one that don understand pretically the whole class don know) anyway that is not the point...the point here is that we are physic student and according to teacher we should be better in maths then other class.. welll..... hmmm looks like is not true that physic student must be better in math..
well the only thing that i can pass now or hoping that i will pass is my chemistry.. so far so good... not cause the teacher is good but cause i got good tuition teacher.. well wat can you expect??
Anyway my exam is next next week and i hope i can do(not do well but jus enuf to pass)jus keep your fingers cross for me will ya??? |

In life there's alwiz two side but sadly people only tend to see the negative side of life.... As they say when there is a positive side there alwiz a negative side,happiness can alwiz end ups to sadness... this is a part of life that noone can change no matter how they try...Noone can stay happy forever or sad forever.. there alwizs up's and down in life...
Well..Everything changes... feeling changes.. object changes then there will be happy feeling when things change... it can even suffer when we hold on to what is not there anymore...Holding on to a love that is constant changing will bring suffering not only mentally but also pysically....
In order not to suffer... we as human shud learn to let go the past and not hanging on to it...as they alwiz say is easy to say then done.. well this is true especially when you jus lost a love one may it be your grandparents or parents or let it be your jus break up with your boyfriend...
Whats the point of crying and hanging on how last time use to be.. it have all past and everything will not return even if you cry your eyes dry.. is it worth it??
I jus broke up with my bf and i've been hanging on to the past.. I tried to change myself convince him that i've change and ask him back but then it maybe a big mistake... hmm... and wat i have was a full memory of suffering..well all this would not have happen if and only if i learn to let go..he was not happy so m i.. both parties is living in hell.. wats the point of being togather when both party is not even happy.. so i decided to let him go... he is a much happier person and i also have learn a valueable lesson that is to let go...
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Wednesday, September 15, 2004

What has becoming in to this world when a 14 year old school girl can get pregnant...Why all this have to happen??The truth is alot of little girl has been decieve by their boyfriends who claim that they will take care of them forever.. with all the sweet talking girls ussually believe them and willing to give them everything including destroying themself...
Girls please do not believe guys that say they will take care of you forever.. eventually things will not work out and feeling can alwiz change...love do not and never equal to sex..no matter how nice are they in the start...looks can be decieving...
Everyday you will hear cases like i have my boyfriends baby and he don care for me anymore..or even your own friend's case... anyway its time for you guls to know about what is happenning...
Guys ussually claim that if the girl love me enough she will give me everything even her body..so if girls submit their body to the guys wat guys have to offer for the girl??Usually everything change after it happen....
In a true relationship you don need to do all this thing to make the relationship strong.. only true understanding and trust will make it strong.. so girls.. beware of lustful guys.. don not fall into the trap of all this guys |

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

this morning i was awaken by a scarry dream i dream that my ex and my friend get togather.. i woke up and got this funny feeling within me i was unhappy... i was searching why would i occur this feeling..maybe i mite still have that little feeling for him or maybe is my friend that get with him..
I remember that day when i broke up and the reason was he is not happy with this relationship so as the people say that with force in relationship you can't get happiness so i would let him go and wish him happy.. but why..Why do i have the unhappy feeling in me.. If he were to be with my friend and be happy about it i shud be happy to...I came to a conclusion that i'm abit selfish... hmm maybe i should really change myself so when people are happy i don get jealous.. but in this world is it that easy to to feel joy when in that sense??? hmmm this question keep me wondering... |

Monday, September 13, 2004

i woke up is was 7 i waited till 11 jus to figure out that no one would call.. i think i got alot of friends but i don hear from them wats another nite all alone when your spending everyday on your own and here goes
i'm jus a kid and life is a nightmare,i'm jus a kid i know that is not fair nobody cares cause i'm alone and the world is having more fun then me tonite..
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